Wednesday, May 12, 2021
WASHINGTON: To better manage collateral damage remediation in overseas operations, the Pentagon has created a new Tactical Empathy And Regret Service (TEARS), to be headed by Army Captain Jiao Cheng. Before immigrating to the U.S. three years ago, Ms....
WASHINGTON: All citizens and residents of Russian national or ethnic origin in America will be required to wear a patch bearing the hammer-and-sickle icon of the Soviet Union, acting Homeland Security chief Kevin McAleenan announced yesterday. “The patch will...
MOSCOW: The dramatic hijacking of Air Force One en route to Moscow has been resolved, enabling President Trump to spend his first full day in Russia. After accepting Putin’s G20 invitation to visit the Russian capital, Trump surprised everyone by...
WASHINGTON: The CIA has revealed bombshell proof that Vladimir Putin personally infiltrated the Democratic National Convention to destroy the candidacy of Hillary Clinton. "We crowd sourced photo analyses of the convention with our rival agencies” said one CIA official,...
WASHINGTON: Frustrated with the tedious, piecemeal approach to enforcing American will abroad, the House and Senate have approved a sweeping bill imposing sanctions against all 195 nations on Earth. Having to craft a sanctions bill for every individual miscreant nation...
by Wendy Dimpleman After returning from a five-day solo road/hiking trip in the lovely, wireless-less canyonlands of Utah last week, my relatives conspired to stage a psychological intervention. I desperately needed help, they said, even though I felt chipper and...
At a folk music festival in Brooklyn’s Prospect Park last weekend, Deirdre Carpenter was manning a Bernie Sanders campaign-sponsored voter registration table with her boyfriend when a group of black-clad, masked radicals began hurling tomatoes at them. “One of...
Following a public spat between their CEOs, Boeing and Lockheed-Martin will face off in a marathon endurance contest billed as the American Air Derby Smackdown. Boeing chief Dennis Muilenberg will fly the company’s troubled 737 airliner against Lockheed-Martin chief...
WASHINGTON: A secret report by all 17 U.S. intelligence agencies concludes that Vladimir Putin has been fueling global warming to make Russia the supreme global hegemon in the near future. A senior intelligence officer whom we cannot name, citing evidence...
In what some historians see as an American replay of the Great Schism that split Christianity between Roman and Byzantine popes, Donald Trump will continue to preside as “acting president” in an exact duplicate of the White House to...

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