LATEST ARTICLES

Jupiter-Saturn conjunction: Behold the woeful future!

by R. Gordon Dalrymple Monday, December 14, marked an alignment of auguries unprecedented in human history (I think): as the Electoral College voted to decide...

Fourth monolith appears in U.S. Capitol building

Ratcheting up the mystery of strange monoliths appearing in Utah, Romania and California recently, a fourth monolith was discovered standing in the nation’s Capitol...

My diagnosis: Bipolitical Disorder with a pharmaceutical deficiency

by Wendy Dimpleman After returning from a five-day solo road/hiking trip in the lovely, wireless-less canyonlands of Utah last week, my relatives conspired to stage...

Man awakening from 20-yr. coma relapses after viewing news video

Ft. Lauderdale CPA Harold Danforth survived a near-fatal car crash on November 24, 2000 before lapsing into a vegetative coma for the next 20...

White Athletes Matter protests rock NFL, NBA

It started when Richard Haalgerd, a third-string point guard for the Milwaukee Bucks, kneeled and raised a clenched fist during the National Anthem before...

Gwenyth Paltrow launches WOOP for White transracials

The Oscar-winning actress and beauty/wellness maven will expand her GOOP line  with WOOP for white transracials — Caucasians transitioning to African-American for now, but...

The new gender religion

by Wendy Dimpleman Geraldine Garza is proudly pregnant, despite not having a womb or any of the plumbing usually necessary to spawn a child. He...

Hours of video soon to equal age of Universe: Is the...

Planet Earth may reach a catastrophic tipping point soon, but it has nothing to do with climate change, according to Hungarian professor of astrophysics...

The Scarlet Letter: Chef fired over “outrageously racist” soup recipe

BELLINGHAM, WA: An award-wining chef has been fired from his job at a 4-star restaurant and dismissed from hosting a popular local TV cooking...

Dirty Robocop: Boston Dynamics suspends AtlasBlue program

Boston Dynamics announced today that its experimental robotic police force in Ft. Wayne, Indiana has been suspended due to “operational failures.” The test program deployed...

White male says minorities should only ride beasts of burden

A white male resident of Little Rock, Arkansas has sparked a storm of Twitter condemnation after proposing that racial minorities should not convey themselves...

Joe Biden found wandering naked near home

WILMINGTON, DE: Joe Biden finally made an appearance from his long seclusion last night, but not one his campaign is celebrating. Police responding to...

Antifa interview: Disband the Blue!

by Harlin Dongbetter It was another sweltering, Venus-like day in humid Austin, portending another Long Hot Summer, I thought, as hundreds of George Floyd marchers...

Op-ed: The Deep State fangs of Remdesivir

R. Gordon Dalrymple Here in the palatial editorial penthouse offices of the Toast, ennui and consternation have reigned — fatigue with coronavirus and the infoglut...

ANTSOCIA: Radical Capitalist militants take to the streets

At a folk music festival in Brooklyn’s Prospect Park last weekend, Deirdre Carpenter was manning a Bernie Sanders campaign-sponsored voter registration table with her...